Sunday, September 25, 2011

A Bit Longer

Hey Guys,

So I know I have been AWOL from this site for a while. I recently started a new job and am trying to focus my time on that. For right now I am not sure how often I will be able to update my site. I do plan on getting back to a weekly routine of recaps, but now for now my postings will most likely be sporadic. I will still be live tweeting during my favorite shows, so be sure to follow me on Twitter  @TVwithAPB

Thanks guys!

Monday, August 29, 2011

Pretty Little Liar 2x11: "Doctor Knows Best"

Emily is tossing and turning in her bed, at 3:07 AM, when she receives a mysterious text from A. After a full 2 hours and 8 minutes of processing this text, she decides to run away from the Marin house. As Emily revs the engine of her, Hanna awakes and realizes her dear roommate, and friend, is gone.

Like any good lover friend, Hanna calls the other two PLL’s to investigate this disappearance, and they come as quickly as possible. Aria is sure that Emily has fled to Texas, and is correct. The camera cuts to Emily, who is in the woods running to Texas as they speak. She’s obviously ditched her car by the side of the road, realizing that traveling by foot is the most practical and safe option. The girls find Emily’s phone and realize that the reason Em’s fled was because A sent her a racy pic of Ezria making out. 

Underneath there is a note reading “clue Ella and I’ll let you out.” Since Emily has a stronger backbone than Hanna, she decided to NOT tell Ella about Aria’s illegal relationship with her teacher, but to flee to Texas instead.

Saturday, August 27, 2011

The Lion Games

Hey guys!!! Have you been watching PLL's new baby sister The Lying Game every Monday night and ABC Family? Well I have and I am ADDICTED! (Btw, I will refer to The Lying Games as "The Lion Games" from now becuase I like that better!) I watched the pilot at least three times already. Here are some of my thoughts on the first two episodes so far:

1) Intro?: I am totally not loving the intro. Compared to the The L Word, this intro is a god send. But seriously, the Lying Game's intro makes no sense to me. Why are they floating in a pool with their finger tips touching?

What does the song have to do with the show? This intro does not tell me anything about the show! Do these girls have a secret? How do I know if they can keep it? Will this one they will save? Can they lock it in their pocket? And most importantly, can they take this one to the grave?

Friday, August 19, 2011

Pretty Little Liars 2x10: "Who Needs To Go To College Anyways?"

College Fair:
It is college fair day at Roseweood High. Due to the fact that this day has optional attendance, I am very curious to see what percent of graduates end up going to college.  Anyway, Aria and Emily decide to get a jump start on this special day and have a breakfast date in the cafeteria.  Both girls have a bunch of Jason gossip to share with each other.

Emily: “Aria, where have you been? We snuck into Jason’s shed last night…”
 Aria: “I kissed Jason. OMG, what should I do? Should I tell Fitz?”
Emily: “Before you tell Fitz anything, Spencer and I found a bagillion picture of you either sleeping or drugged in Jason’s shed. Probably both though. It was pretty scary.”
Aria: “Wait ew creepy.”
Emily: “He is probably the one who taught Mike how to steal pottery from a cops apartment. He is totally using Mike to get closer to you.” (Spencer sits down at the table) “SPENCER. ARIA KISSED JASON. THEY KISSED, THEY KISSED.”

Spencer and Aria leave Emily to eat her well balanced breakfast on her own. She pours the Alpha-Bits into her bowl and is shocked to see the only Alpha-Bit coming out are “A”s. Inside, she finds a note that read: “You are the Weakest Link.  Goodbye.”

Saturday, August 13, 2011

Pretty Little Liars 2x09: "Aria... The New Catnip for Pedophiles Everywhere"

Morning Adventures
Aria is at Ezra’s apartment for an early morning make-out session After Ezra goes to turn off his 7:21 alarm, he turns into Jason. Instead of shrieking  “Why is this ugly monster in Fitz’s bed,” Aria continues to make out with Jason… until her own alarm wakes her up. Everyone can take a big old deep breath now, the Jaria make-out session was only a dream.

Over at the morgue, Hanna and Emily have decided to join Spencer in the “Candy Striper Game”. They stand lookout while Spencer snoops around for the missing page from Allison’s coroner’s report.  

Spencer’s Scooby nose is not having luck today though. The page is nowhere to be found, and the coroner’s computer is password protected.  Does Hanna not remember that her boyfriend is a professional hacker from Allentown who used to be involved with hacking government websites? His expertise could have been useful in this very situation. Spencer is on full “Jason Did It” mode. Since A got killed by an object that may be a hockey stick and Jason may have had a hockey stick, he is the ONLY suspect. This may be just a guess, but I bet there were a ton of field hockey girls that hated Alison as well. Anyway, the three girls get distracted because Jenna and a nurse emerge from the elevator talking about Jenna’s miracle soon to be eye-surgery. Are surgery and the morgue on the same floor or is Jenna just there to feel her donor’s eyes?

Friday, August 5, 2011

Pretty Little Liars 2x08: "There's a Hole in the Stomach, Dear Emily, A Hole"

Scooby Stake-out:
Aria, Spencer and Hanna are chilling outside Emily’s old casa as Spencer retells the Garrett Incident.  Grumpy Hanna is not in the mood to hear other people’s problems tonight and starts bitching about the car’s temperature. There is no question in Hanna’s mind for why Garrett has Jenna’s clay pot. OBVIOUSLY, Garrett is just bringing raw meat to feed to Jenna’s cat. Problem solved. When Spencer pokes a small whole in Hanna’s theory (the fact that Jenna does not actually have a cat), Hanna retorts with the only logical conclusion; Garrett was bringing raw meat for Jenna. Aria tries to change the direction of conversation.

Aria: Hanna I see Emily, so stop being such a bitch. Why is Emily in her old house anyway?
Hanna: Something about her stupid alarm system. No one should be worried about crime in this town anymore now that your little bro is on house arrest.
Aria: Hanna not cool.
Hanna: I mean, there is no other illegal activity going on in this town. It is not like my bf is running an illegal phone hacking op or A is trying to kill us. Mike was the only problem.
Spencer: Hanna, if you get laid in the woods underneath the sound of owls swooping down for prey, would you be less of a bitch?

Friday, July 29, 2011

Pretty Little Liars 2x07: "You Don't Just Bury Field Hockey Sticks that Aren't Murder Weapons"

The Marin Café: 
The girls gather at Hanna’s house to drink from her ever flowing coffee fountain. Hanna can’t hold in her excitement over the fact that a random pipe burst in the guest bedroom forcing her and Emily to sleep in the same room.  Hanna is all like “Emily, we can have a never ending sleepover. Mona used to ask me for them all the time. She’d want us stay in bed all day in our underwear and wife-beaters. Weird huh?” 

The door bells rings and Hanna walks in with a gift basket from A.

Hanna bitches that if A is going to torture them she should at least have the decency to send quality chocolate and then throws the chocolate in the trash. Dude, you would have really regretted that if Emily wasn’t living in your house as your personal chef.  The girls come to 2 earth shattering conclusions.

1) A’s goal is no longer to just make them look like bitches.
2) A could have possibly been the person to kill Allison.

Sunday, July 24, 2011

Awkward 1x01 "Putting the Awesome in Awkward"

I was skeptical about the new show Awkward for a few reasons. One was that I am very awkward myself, and I am uncomfortable watching other people be awkward (see my Parks and Recreation post). Another reason was because MTV’s last teen comedy, Skins US, was such a bust. I have to say, I was more than pleasantly surprised when I watch the series premier Tuesday.  The show was the perfect mix of funny, awkward, over-the-top and realistic. Jenna Hamilton is the female version of Seth Cohen, but less self deprecating and more self aware. I have only known her for 20 minutes of my life, and I am already in love. Okay, onto the episode at hand:

We begin at Camp Pookah’s afternoon dance where “the dorks were getting crunk and the rest of us were getting drunk.”   Jenna is sitting in the corner drinking her cool-kid spiked punch staring at the beautifully hunky Matty. The two proceed with an utterly unique mating ritual, beginning with male. Matty points at Jenna, accompanied by a wink, and then proceeds to sniff under his arms (proving his male dominance). It is now Jenna’s turn in this mating dance. Having already decided that Matty is a suitable mate, Jenna spills punch on the camper sitting in front of her. This lets Matty know that it is time to move things into the janitor's closet.

Friday, July 8, 2011

Pretty Little Liars 2x04: "The Not So Lucky Horseshoe"

Last week my older sister told me that she’s scared to watch Pretty Little Liars  alone. I made fun of her and said she was ridiculous; the show is not THAT scary. This week, I had to eat my words as I hid my head under my blanket in fear of A.

Other Side of Town: The Liars travel to the other side of the tracks to buy back Melissa’s pawned engagement ring. While Spencer goes inside to deal with the pawn broker, the other girls stand in the creepy dumpy back alley, where the pawn show resides. For the occasion, Aria has decided to dress up in her ghetto attire. She replaced the bird in her hair with a bandana, put some big ass hoop earrings in her ears and sported a lime green jacket.

Wednesday, July 6, 2011

Weeds 7x02: "Trading Bombs for Weed"

Good things that happened Monday July 4th: Fireworks, Musical Performances, Barbeques.
Bad things that happened Monday July 4th: This week’s episode of Weeds. The show has not sold me on any of the plotlines (except, maybe, for Silas’ modeling career).

Nancy’s No Good Rotten Day: While Nancy is trying to fall asleep in her new abode, her roommate is having food phone sex. That was one of the most disturbing conversations I have ever heard. I will never be able to think of chunks of fruit the same way EVER AGAIN. Just as my ears start bleeding, Nancy grabs the phone from her roommate’s hand and throws the battery out the window. She needs rest for tomorrow’s illegal activities.

The next morning Counselor Ed tells Nancy that she has an interview at a lamp repair shop. Nancy rambles on to Counselor Ed until he gives her extra time out of the house and then he tells her she can’t wear her normal slutty clothes to the interview. Instead she has to wear a dress suit circa 1983, donated by a Korean church. This outfit was god awful. I know that was the point, but still, were those gold tights necessary. They were disgusting.

Saturday, July 2, 2011

Pretty Little Liars 2x03: "My Name is Anita"

Black and Whites: The Pretty Little Liars sit in the empty Rosewood Theatre watching a black and white movie (the type that Emily even likes). All of a sudden, a hooded man with a hook pops up in the back of the theater and screams “I Know What You Did Last Summer!” Turns out it was just one of Spencer’s nightmares. That does not matter though. What DOES matter, more than anything in the universe, is that Melissa’s wedding ring is missing, and must be found immediately.

No Dairy: Hanna struts into the kitchen wearing a dress stolen from Spencer’s wardrobe and is greeted by her parents having a hardy morning chuckle (not a sexual innuendo).
Tom is still in town and staying at the Rosewood Inn. The situation gets real serious when Hanna realizes her mom bought non-dairy creamer for Tom.  Hanna tells her mom to that anything Tom Riddle does from here on out should be Isabel’s problem and not theirs.  Ashley puts on her parenting hat and tells Hanna that “Just because someone hurts us once doesn’t mean you delete them from your phone book.” Hanna just responds with “Dude, A has hit me with a freaking car and I still can’t get her out of my phonebook.”

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Weeds 7x01: Dime Bags to Grenades

Danbury, CT: Three years have passes since last season’s finale and Nancy Botwin is in a Federal Prison in Danbury, CT. She struts into her parole hearing sporting a green jump suit, glasses and a pair of messy pigtails.

Even though Nancy has served less than half of her sentence, she is eligible to be let out. Nancy is understandably upset when the officers reveal that she will be released to a halfway house instead of witness protection, as she was promised.

Saturday, June 25, 2011

Pretty Little Liars 2x02: "Time Lords and Green Houses"

The Greenhouse Effect:  A door eerily slams as the Liars huddle together in the magical greenhouse. Vines hang down from the ceiling, ready strangle them; this is one of the many obstacles the Liars must defeat if they want to obtain the Philosopher’s Stone. Wait, sorry; this is not a magical greenhouse, just a normal creepy abandoned one. Rocks start storming down from the sky onto the glass ceiling and the Liars make the smart decision of evacuating the building.

On their stroll home they spy the newly cast Jason DiLaurentis throwing every single belonging in his house into recycling bins. (Hey, at least he recycles) How did Jason get his old house back? Did Maya’s parents want out of the haunted house so badly that they gave it to him? Did he buy the house because of all its precious memories? The Liars let that mystery go because they have too many mysteries in their life as it is. 

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Pretty Little Liars 2x01: "It's Alive" and Most Likely Ian

We are back. The show we have all been waiting for has finally aired its second season premier and all is right in the world. For this first time in my life I actually found myself saying “Praise the Lord. All is right in the world.”

Rosewood’s Finest- The PLLs are standing in a semi-circle trying to process the whole “A pushed Ian into a ropes course which strangled him but now his dead body is missing” situation.  Did anyone else notice how perfectly gorgeous Emily’s cheekbones were in this scene? They were beautiful. Garret (the corrupt policeman dating Jenna) informs the girls he needs to drive them to the police station.  Even though there is another cop car right in front of his, Garret decides to sneakily pull into a dark abandoned alley to have a private chat with the girls.
Once safely out of the possibly bugged car, he informs them that they need to keep the blackmailing Ian thing a secret because it is super illegal. The girls are all like “Gotta Secret? We can keep it. Swear this one we’ll save.” On the corner of the street Jenna is standing and listening to their super secret conversation with her supersonic hearing.  Later, when Jenna and Garret reconnect in to do some surveillance, Garret starts freaking out and goes “If anyone finds out about the Jason thing.” What? There is a Jason thing? How many things happen in this town? Jenna calms Garret down by tell him that this secret won’t get out because they’ll take this one to the grave.

Thursday, June 9, 2011

Bones- 6x23 “The Change in the Game”

So I know this is super late. I realized I forgot to post this recap ages ago! Better late than never right?

Bowling with Kids: Just so you know, the most direct way into my heart is television and bowling. That is why, when Bones opening scene was a bowling alley birthday party, I was gleeful beyond belief. If bowling alone was not enough to get me hooked, the mother of the bratty birthday boy is Libby from Sabrina the Teenage Witch. It takes .2 seconds for Libby’s Westbridge High bitchiness to come out as she threatens her son to behave. Next thing you know the 8 and 10 pin, along with a dead body, descend from the pin setting machine; a split so difficult not even a dead body could spare it.

Baby Drama: Hodgins and Angela are at the Royal Diner and Angela complains that she is 2 days overdue. If memory serves me correct, last episode Angela had a month until her due date which means this episode takes place a full month after last week’s. While discussing how to handle the possible blindness of their baby to be, Angela drenches her fries with hot sauce in hopes to induce labor.  She begins chowin’ down those fries like it is nbd. Feeling his manhood fade away with each fry Angela puts in her mouth, Hodgins adds a splash of hot sauce to his own plate. Unfortunately he is not able to handle the heat and begins to choke.

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Beware: Five Shows Not to Watch During Dinner!

Have you ever sat down in front of the TV excited to watch an amazing hour of television accompanied by a delicious mouth watering meal? Has that meal ever been ruined due to the fact that the stories told or images on the screen made you sick to your stomach? You are now forced to either a) stop eating b) stop watching or c) keep eating and watching without being able to enjoy either! After having this happen to me way too many times, I have decided to help out the world and advise you on the top five shows not to watch while eating.

5) Law and Order: SVU- I love this show. I love Benson, I love Stabler, and most of all I love Alex Cabot. That said there are very few things that make me as ill as pedophilia and rape. The show is not as graphic as many others; we do not often see people getting tortured or raped. What makes my stomach churn while watching SVU is how it reveals the darkest side of human nature. There are episodes that are burned into my brain that, when I think about years after, still make me feel queasy. One of these episodes is called “Slaves” where a man keeps a teenage girl in a box only to take her out to torture and rape her. Watch at your own discretion.

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

'Parks and Recreation'...Will You Be Mine?

On April 9, 2009 my TV was tuned into NBC so I could watch their Thursday night comedy lineup. That night a new show was airing called Parks and Recreation. I watched the show for about 8 minutes and then decided to stop watching. Please put your pitchforks and other weapons away and let me explain this further before you attack me for my rash dismissal of this work of art.

Thursday, May 19, 2011

Top Five Nostalgic TV Dates

Sorry for the long wait, but here are my pick of Top Five Nostalgic TV shows to watch when drunk. You do not have to be drunk to enjoy it, but it can sometimes make it more fun. 

Mighty Morphin Power Rangers: When I think about first grade, this show is literally the first thing that flashes through my mind. I have to say my affinity towards the color yellow and Asians dates back to my viewing of the show when I thought Trini was the leader of all things cool. (I am not the one being racist here; the show made me put that phrase together!!). I also was kind of in love with Kimberly, the pink Ranger, who was in love with the Green ranger. (Side note: the Red Ranger Jason followed up his kid show acting career with acting in gay porn. I was going to add a link but I couldn't find one that was not X rated.)  So each of these awesome teens would morph into rangers to fight evil and in that morphed form can control a mechanical dinosaur. Not sold yet? Just watch this clip:

Sunday, April 10, 2011

Top Ten Drunken Nostolgic TV Dates pt1

Tonight my friend JC and I watched the first half of Sabrina The Teenage Witch Season 1. Do not fret my fair readers (as far and few between of you there are) when I finish rewatching Season 1 there will be synopsis. Seven episodes in and I already have two pages worth of thoughts and notes. Suffice to say, my friend thought I was a freak when I asked her for pen and paper while watching in order to record my thoughts which had the potential of being fleeting.

I started thinking about this post before tonight viewing even started. Just imaging entering the time machine that is childhood television memories and being immersed in that utter bliss made me giddy. What other shows would I go back and watch drunk after I experience this magical linen closet filled night. I did not expect to feel the utter glee and excitement that overtook my body while sipping on a glass of cheap Pinot Grigio and watching a young Melissa Joan Hart levitate above her bed. The grin on my face wouldn’t disappear. If I could feel so much ecstasy while watching Sabrina drunk, I wonder how I would feel watching other childhood favorites while slightly/very much so inebriated. Here is numbers 10-6 of nostalgic shows. Shows 5-1 will be posted soon, do not fret!

10) Bug Juice: “Bug Juice, doesn’t come in a jar/ Bug Juice comes from who you are/ You have the flavor of what you can become..” The next 25 seconds after that are pretty boring.

Saturday, April 9, 2011

Fringe: Five Thoughts on Season 2

This season was mind-blowing. Season two was much more serial in its storytelling than Season one, which was more episodic. I feel I could write two posts worth of discussion for the season finale alone but I am going to edit myself so I can discuss best of the entire season. Here are some of the things that I loved, hated or were puzzled by in Season 2 of Fringe.

Nina Sharp and Broyles: If you recall from my Season 1 Fringe post, I had shipped Sharp and Broyles. I wanted them together so badly and I swear to god when I wrote that post I had yet to dive into season two. You can imagine my utter glee when, in the season premier of season two, Nina gave Phillip a big ole’ passionate kiss. I actually screamed “Holy shit I was RIGHT” out loud to myself.

Could it be? What I right all along? I was so excited to see this relationship develop. Were they a couple or just colleagues with benefits (when in the same city of course). Sadly these questions were never answered. Yes Sharp and Broyles interacted through the course of season 2 but we never saw another smooch. That was the only PDA we got from them and their relationship was never defined. Fringe, I fell for the bait and now I am stuck on the hook! Please writers just reel me in during season 3!! Make them official!

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Ready to Catch New VD's

I know it has been around all season, but I really can't get over how clever that ad campaign is. Although we shouldn't be joking about STDs being spread, I think it is genius. I laugh every time! Seriously marketing at its finest.

I hope everyone is ready for the return of The Vampire Diaries and the almost always shirtless Salvatore Brothers. It has been a lonely six weeks in APB land without my favorite vampires, doppelgangers, witches and Gilberts. O Vampire Diaries how I have missed you. I am not really into spoilers, I like seeing the show as it goes, but I have seen the previews, sneak peaks and pictures of who was cast as Klaus. Sometimes I want to say  I more excited than words but that is never true because directly after I talk about my excitement. First lets all watch the promo and then discuss:

Off the bat I notice, there is a hell of a lot of screaming in the short promo which means, the rest of the season is going to be awesome!!!  Elena's mom, Isobel is back in town. Let us not forget that Isobel is not merely Elena's birth mother. No my friends, that would make the show too boring. Isobel is also Alaric's ex-wife who after researching vampires decided that she wanted to be turned by none other than Mr. Damon Salvatore. When you think about it, this show is almost as, if not more, incestuous than The OC. I love Isobel so so much. Partially it is because of Jenny on The L Word but also we have no idea what her game is. Why is she really there? Does she really care about Elena? How are the interaction with Alaric going to play out? We know she still loves him, but he doesn't because she compelled him to forget!!

There is so much awesomeness bundled in that 31 second clip I can't stop smiling. I am ready for Elena/Katherine switches galore! I wonder if Isobel will be able to tell the difference between the two like Stefan? The only thing I am truly worried about is the Matt storyline. I am scared that he is going to become totally anti vampire and tries to get everyone against Caroline subsequently turning into a person I hate. On the opposite end, him knowing about the supernatural powers that be in Mystic Falls may make his character obsolete. Lets keep our fingers crossed that neither of my predictions come true.

So lets get pumped for tomorrow night at 8pm. It is going to be a good one!


Monday, April 4, 2011

"Grey's Anatomy" 7x18 "The Hot Mess Beneath the Song"

Oh Greys Anatomy musical, I wanted to love you so much. Unfortunately I can’t honestly say that I did. I am going to recap this episode song by song like my Gleecaps. So let’s dive right into the hot mess that was Greys.

“Chasing Cars” The episode starts off with a jolt. Arizona awakes from her post crash daze only to find half of Callie’s body in the car, and the other half through the windshield. Why, might you ask, was Callie flung from her seat while Arizona was only attacked by an airbag? The answer is because she was not wearing a seatbelt (for which I blame Mark). Cue Callie’s out of body experience singing a line from the opening song as real life Callie freaks out. The extra playing the truck driver runs up to a frantic Arizona and only says “Oh, Oh no mumble mumble” in what sounds like a Canadian accent. Forty-six seconds in and the future of this episode is already looking pretty bleak and supposedly “mysterious.”

When the ambulance pulls up every important surgeon at Seattle Grace (aka the whole cast of the show) is waiting. Out of Body Callie, starts singing “Chasing Cars” and the vocals are overpowered by the instrumentals which make it sound weak and timid. As Owen is telling Callie to “stay with him” he breaks into song and I break into my first laughing fit of the hour. Callie reacts in a similar fashion and has a freak out behind her oxygen mask. Kevin McKidd moves his head too much and makes too many facial expressions when singing. Actually he does that when he acts too. Probably why I hate him so much. Bailey’s singing while acting was much better. Her singing did not change her actions which made it easier to watch and accept that a surgeon can sing and cut into a person at the same time.

For the second time in the scene a teary eyed Arizona stares at the closing elevator door and says “I asked her to marry me and a truck came out of nowhere.” My tears of laughter started to tearn into tears of pain.

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Grey's 7x17: The Car Crash for a Musical

Sorry for the lateness. I am on vaca at my Grandma’s without wireless.

Sex vs. Stark: The episode opens with Jackson taking off his shirt, which is always a lovely sight, followed by he and Lexie start is getting hot and heavy on the washing machine. Suddenly, April the nun enters wanting nothing more than to clean her laundry. The easiest solution for April is to leave and do her laundry later because truthfully, once Lexie and Jackson start to get their chemistry on, you can’t stop the reaction.

April and Stark’s relationship has blossomed and grown since we last saw the half young couple. Apparently they are getting mixed signals about their relationship because April believes they are just friends while, truthfully, we are not fully sure what Stark thinks because he is not a main character. Stark allows Karev to actually do his job and help April with her patients so she can get to their date on time. Stark being nice to Karev, now you KNOW Stark wants in April’s pants.

Friday, March 25, 2011

Fringe Season 1: 6 Reasons It Was Awesome

Last Friday I was reading some of TheTVReferee’s tweets about Fringe and asked myself “Why again am I not watching that show?” So now seven days and 20 episodes later, I have completed Season One and I am as hooked as a “Trouty Mouth’s” lips. So below you will discover 6 things that I feel make this wacky, crazy, sci-fi, paranormal, amazing show so awesome.

1) What Dharma Could Have Been: After two episodes of this show I just kept thinking to myself, wow this is what Lost could have been like if we knew the shit Dharma was actually doing. I mean, aren't the experiments and paranormal and wacky shit that happens on Fringe what you imagined the Dharma initiative did as well, or at least the island. I mean time travel, random guys showing up everywhere (comparing Jacob to the Observer), mad sexual tension between the two leads. Okay, okay, the last one has nothing to do with the Dharma Initiative but anytime I can bring up Kate and Jack as a couple I will.

2)Gene: At first the cows presence was for practical reasons. This specific cow was the closest thing to humans and therefore it would be more ethical to do these experiments on the cow than on a human. I am pretty sure that no experiments have been conducted on Gene. Instead they order mice and rats to treat as, well, actual lab rats. Gene just looks over from his humble abode and laughs at them. Gene gets the royal treatment in the Bishop Laboratory. Walter takes the time out of his busy day to milk Gene and gets Astrid to help him with brushing Gene’s hair. My favorite part about Gene though, by far, is the reaction people have when they see Gene in the lab. Priceless.

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Chris Brown on GMA: One Step Back for Humanity, One Huge Leap Back For Hair

All morning everyone has been going wild over Chris Brown's appearance on Good Morning America. I found out about it through my always trusty site/ mecca Entertainment Weekly. I do not usually talk about celebrity gossip on this site, but I just had to discuss this Chris Brown interview.

Okay first things first, WHAT IS UP WITH THAT HAIR. I saw it and the first thing that came to my mind was Luda's  "Roll Out" : "What the world is in that HAIR, What you got in that HAIR?" The answer is  a liter of bleach and a shit ton of crazy. He looks like Eminem circa 2001. I think he may have even been an extra in "The Real Slim Shady" music video. Seriously dude, that look didn't work ten years ago, and it still wont work today. That plus his cut off denim jacket with his fully tattooed arms. Too much Chris Brown. Too much. I think what made this even better is the fact that Robin Roberts starts off the interview by saying "My hair has grown a great deal since the last time I saw you too" (which truthfully it hadn't. Even though I am baffled why she made that statement, just so you know Robin  your hair is not the issue here.  Your hair is not the issue.

Sunday, March 20, 2011

Criminal Minds: Are There Any Females Left?

Although Criminal Minds has been around since 2005, I only began watching in during my 2009-2010 winter break. I came home and the show was on both the Ion and A&E TV. Since there were no new episodes of my favorite shows airing, I began to watch it. I fell in love almost immediately. The first episode I ever watched was episode 3x01 “Doubt,” because I saw Elizabeth Hendrickson (Maggie/Frankie from AMC) in it. From that moment on I was hooked. I watched every episode that aired during break and when I got back to school I ordered the rest on Netflix. The show was mesmerizing and different from any other crime drama. The way the story was told, how you got to see into the Unsub’s, mind was amazing.

For the most part of its six year run, I have really loved and appreciated all of the main characters. Derek Morgan, although sometimes feeling morally superior to others, may be one of the sexiest men in the world. Add to that he is sensitive and awesome and you have the most attractive smoking hot man on TV (except for Taye Diggs). I also love Hotch. I have watched the 100th episode of Criminal Minds more times that I can recall. If you watch that episode and do not find a place in your heart for Aaron Hotchner, I think you are missing your humanity. Spencer Reid is a fun, cut, geeky character that the audience always just wants to hug. Finally you have David Rossi, the old, sometimes grumpy , but ultimately loveable old member.

Friday, March 18, 2011

Glee 2x16: "Original Songs Are Oh So Good"

So I am back to my usual recap by song recapping of Glee for this amazing Regionals episode.

“Misery”- What’s the best was to start an episode of Glee? Have Blaine bust open the doors to the Warblers practice room, throwing paper in the air and singing. Ten seconds in and the episode already has me hooked. While everyone seems super excited to sing background to Blaine, Kurt seems bored of the group being “Blaine and the Pips.” Kurt tells him that although his solos are great, they are also numerous. Also does anyone else feel like the Warblers are kinda like a cult?

“Only Child”- This is Rachel’s follow up to the amazing “My Headband”. It’s about being an only child oddly enough. Finn admits that it was a better attempt than “My Headband” but not by far. Here, for the first time in quite some time, we see the old sweet and thoughtful Finn. The Finn that brought Rachel to his quadriplegic friend Sean to show her that your life is not over if you can’t sing. He tells her to dig deeper into herself and tap into her real emotions. When she does that she will be able to write a killer song. Quinn watches this interaction from afar and begins a voice over about her Prom Queen dreams. Cut to her opening her closet which is not filled with one or two, but at least SEVEN tiara’s.

Yes I counted ATLEAST seven! Seriously that’s ridiculous! At first I thought they were her mom’s and her Prom Queen aspirations were due to parental pressures. That is not the case though. She decides to befriend Rachel in order to keep her away from Finn and assure an extra five years of life by winning the Prom Queen crown.

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Skins 1x09- One of the Worst Episodes of Televsion

It is a fair to say that I will pretty much watch any TV show. I will give any show a chance and let it ride for a little bit until it gets on its steady tracks. There are some shows that I decide are decent but are not my cup of tea so I stop watching and others I keep on the backburner for when I am bored. I literally watched an episode of The Real Housewives of Orange County THREE TIMES in a row because I couldn't find my channel changer and I didn't want to get up from my bed. Last nights episode of Skins US was physically painful for me to sit through. Yes Skins is known for being over the top, crazy and things sometimes seem implausable, but in the end their is truth to the characters. Not only is their truth and honesty to the emotions that Skins usually creates but more importantly the storylines are entertaining.

Thursday, March 10, 2011

Glee: The Landslide Will Bring You Down

There has been a lot of discussion about this weeks episode of Glee, and I wanted to put in my two cents as well. I am only really going to go over the Santana Brittany storyline of this episode because I feel like I have a lot to say about it. I have been going over it and over it in my head for the last two days.

Tempted by the Fruit of Another: After Brittany discovers that the stork that built a nest outside of her window is not bringing her a baby, she goes over to Santana’s to put in a Sweet Valley High DVD and get her cuddle on. While they were getting dressed after their sweet lady kisses (which isn't cheating because the plumbing is different) Brittany wants to talk about her feeling. Santana immediately shuts this down; she can’t talk to Brittany about her feelings because they are locked behind a steel door. If she lets them out then there is no turning back. Brittany convinces Santana to talk with an adult with her to try and figure out what is going on between them. Right here, this look Santana gives Brittany at this moment is the moment that the armor around Santana begins to break and she starts to give into her feelings.

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Greek Series Finale: Oh Cappy My Captain

The Main Plot: The whole episode revolves around destruction of the KT house. Last week, after an awesome bed jumping party which led to the ceiling collapsing in, Spidey’s dad offered to buy the house for the fraternity. Although he seemed like a hero, you could tell from Parker’s reaction that there are some deep childhood issues between him and pops. The ass that is Spidey’s dad was apparently behind all of the destruction of KT this season. His whole plan was to get the house taken away from the fraternity in order to buy the land and donate it to the school. Want to know what makes this situation even more complicated? The case that Prof. Segal has Casey and Evan working on is this case, on the side of Lasker Parker (Spidey’s dad). As she should be Casey is torn.

Ghosts of Girlfriends Past: There was some precious bonding moments between Dale and Bex this week which I just ate up. First of all Rebecca may be my favorite character on the show. I think she is hilarious (although over the top at times), but she is a straight talker and is a really caring person at the end of the day. Rebecca and Dale are sulking due to the fact that while everyone around them seems to be getting engaged, they have never been in a successful relationship. Bex exclaims that she couldn't make it last with either boy that rode the Casey Train (Cappie and Evan) “or a girl.” Yes! I love how the show remembered this! I love bringing back references to past storylines in TV shows. To be truthful just the idea of Rebecca being gay again makes me happy. So to solve their problems, Rebecca comes up with a foolproof plan to discover why they are suck at relationships.

Rebecca: Hey, remember that terrible Matthew Mcconaughey film?
Dale: Sahara? Ed TV? The Wedding Planner? Failure to Launch? How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days? Fools Gold?
Rebecca: No! Ugh, “Ghosts of Girlfriends Past!” He visited all of his exes to learn about what went wrong.

I was cracking up, why does Dale know all these Matthew Mcconaughey films off the top of his head? Also Bex is so exasperated with him not knowing which movie that she just cut him off. The two join cahoots and decide to go ask all their exes why their relationships did not flourish. Later Bex runs into the kitchen, where Dale is frosting a cake, to announce the Robin claimed their relationship didn’t work out because Rebecca is not a lesbian. To this Dale responds in a perfectly monotone voice “despite your masculing energy.” I am dying here, I love these two. Laura walks into the kitchen and Dale conjures all of his confidence and asks her why they didn’t work out. Am I going crazy here or did he ignore her? Anyway they decide to get back together right there and then and push Bex into the cake while doing so. What do you think this face means? Whether she is happy or sad, she looks like a cute little puppy.

Sunday, February 27, 2011

The Vampire Diaries 2x16: The Grill Explodes

So there are so many reasons for why I love this episode; so many reasons that, after I watched the episode, I almost couldn’t contain myself. So, here is my TVD recap so you don’t cry during the next six week hiatus of withdrawal.

Morning Sex: Elena is over at the Salvatore mansion going all crazy because she and Stefan are going to be late to school. Wow, this is the first time in a while I even remembered that Stefan is even a student. As a matter of fact, why is he a student? When you are over 100 years old you should be able to bypass the education system. Stefan I guess agrees with me because when it comes to choosing between getting Elena back into bed and expanding his mind, he is the normal sexed up teenage boy. Elena only gives Stefan five minutes and he is all surprised. I am pretty sure that a vampire can get their business done in five minutes and still have it be good. That is just projection though; I am not speaking from experience.

Saturday, February 26, 2011


So many good television shows this week. I mean GREAT!!! I am not sure where exactly to start. Recaps will begin to crank out by tomorrow.


Friday, February 18, 2011

Top Chef 8x10: Can You Tell me How to Get.... How to Get to Target

Before I begin this recap, let me just say how much I loved this episode. I have seen every single episode of all eight seasons of Top Chef and I definitely have had episodes that I loved more than others. I can say, hands down, that this was the best episode of Top Chef EVER. Anyone who knows me knows that one of my two dream jobs is to work on Sesame Street. I even wrote a post about the show last year discussing why television is so important. The work Sesame Street does is truly amazing. So to combined Top Chef, Sesame Street and Target in one episode was almost too much for me to handle.

Post Elimination Pity Party: The chestestants are sitting around the stew room sulking after the elimination of our beloved Italian Fabio. Anyone who still thinks that the producers make the judges keep chefs around because of their personality should shove that theory up their ass after this elimination. I am pretty sure that Fabio is the most adored Top Chef contestant ever. Blais is bummed that Fabio didn’t ask him for help on the challenge even though Richard owns a burger joint. I truthfully don’t think that he would have changed what he was doing. Fabio didn’t want to make a burger so he didn’t make a burger. This is a recurring theme for him. As the three Chicago chefs cheers their season, Dale tells that camera that he doesn’t believe in this “everyone is a winner” philosophy people are talking about these days (Dale definitely couldn’t be a counselor at Campus Kids).Winning is all that matters, Dale wants to win and will rip apart young children and use them as protein in order to win this season.

Cookie Time: The chefs walk into the Top Chef Kitchen and Padma starts talking in rhyme. “Why is she talking in rhyme?” you might ask yourself. The answer is because sunny days are chasing the clouds away. Out from behind the table pops Elmo, Cookie Monster and Telly Monster who are going to be the judges for the Cookie Quick Fire challenge.

This was so much fun to watch, I can’t even begin to imagine how much fun it must have been to be on set. As Padma is announcing the challenge Cookie Monster keeps interrupting her just yelling about cookies. Whether that as scripted or not, it still made me smile and giggle like a 5 year old like a little kid.

Blais and Antonia are super stoked about this challenge because they both have kids that love the show. Actually it seemed like Antonia was the most star struck out of all the chefs. She couldn’t stop smiling and singing to herself. On the other hand though there is Mike and Angelo who apparently have never made a cookie from scratch before. How is this possible, I mean I think my ten year old cousin can make a cookie. Dale struggles to not to curse out the cute and furry Muppets as they heckle him for using potato chips in his cookie . See Dale, that anger management class did you good. In the end using those potato chips was a good thing since it won him the challenge.

Padma had a ton of fun judging the cookies with Muppets. Here are my two favorite moments of this challenge
1) After Padma utilizes a “teachable moment” (something Sesame Street is all about) explaining that the spices cardamom and cinnamon come from the same region, Elmo responds with “TMI”
2) Although everyone agreed it was delicious, Elmo says Antonia’s cookie looks like a “cow chip"

Elimination Challenge: So Padma announces that this week’s challenge is going to be the biggest money that Top Chef has ever given away in a single challenge. If they are saying that this is the most money they have given away in one challenge this season then this is true. If they are saying that this is the most money given ever then this is not true. In Season 6, Top Chef gave away $30,000 for the Bocuse d’Or challenge which Kevin won. This just seems bizarre that they would announce the $25,000 dollar prize as the largest sum they have awarded to the winner when that isn’t true. I know that I am obsessed with television’s continuity and details, but if I can notice this error the producers of the show should notice.

This week, in order to win the not biggest prize the show has ever given, they chefs have to cook a meal at Target and can only use items in the store. This means that they can’t bring their own knives. Half the chefs just had a heart attack and the other half already started to feel separation anxiety. Their faces say it all.

They get to THE BIGGEST TARGET STORE IN THE WORLD at midnight to start the fun. They had three hours and full access to any items in the store. It was a lot of fun watching the chefs run around with their carts just grabbing random shit from the shelves. There seemed to be absolutely no order to what they were grabbing, just anything they could maybe possibly use. Mike and Angelo are apparently the new married couple on the show and are sharing cooking appliance and calling each other honey. They are grabbing things for each other, helping each other out, or well actually Angelo just keeps doing what Mike asks. Carla struggles in this challenge and all I want to do is shake her and tell her to get her head in the game. Dude, no one cares about linens. I understand that it is midnight and you are tired but you are in a cooking competition. FOOD should be the first this on your mind!! But like always she is running around like a chicken with her head cut off and she is the last one to set up her table. In the end her food struggles.

The only two people that really wowed me in this challenge were Antonia (as she always does) and Dale. First, they didn’t soup which, as the show mentioned many times, almost everyone did. Antonia made eggs to order… for 100 people at 3 AM in the morning. Ballsy, this girl is ballsy and that is why she is my favorite (also she was wearing that cute purple/pink shirt in her interview that I like so much). Dale on the other hand won my heart over by making the most perfect drunk food with an iron. Yes he used an iron to press the grilled cheeses down to crisp the bread. He then placed it in some tomato soup which looked delish. 

Carla, Angelo and Tiffany are on the bottom this week. It was one of the most tense and emotionally charged non-finale judges’ table I have ever seen. Tiffany give an emotional speech about how amazing this experience has been for her and everyone starts tearing up.  In the end it was Angelo and his overly salted potato soup that got sent home.

So that is my recap. Were you guys as jazzed about Sesame Street as I was? Did you think it was the best episode of Top Chef ever also. Let me know!


Thursday, February 17, 2011

Glee 2x13: Bieber gives Glee and Me a Comeback

So we start out this week with Will in his Spanish class (yes remember guys he is also a teacher). This is only interrupted by Sue trying to suicide herself (yes that is a Top Chef Fabio reference) by Gummy Vitamins.

1) Baby- Sam is trying to woo Quinn back from the weird place she has been after getting mono from “saving Finn’s life.” In order to do this he decides to become more like the Biebster. He combs his hair in the perfect Bieber fashion and tests out his new persona at the ever pronounced and revered institution called the Jewish Bat Mitzvah.

Turns out those tweens loved the Samiester (really cant ship those two names), so there is only one more place to go... GLEE PRACTICE. He puts on a purple sweatshirt and sings the mega hit “Baby” which according to him is “super emotional and sums up our generation.” Never have truer words been spoken, Sam. Never have truer words been spoken. With his mouth looking larger than ever he serenades Quinn equipped with all the necessary Bieber moves. All of the glee girls are totally into it and all the boys (besides Finn who is bitter and jealous) totally wants in on the Biebster.

Overall this was a great performance. Sam sang it very well and his dance moves... just adorable. Also I have a new found appreciation for Justin Bieber after seeing his movie in 3D, albeit I was drunk, but I still loved it nonetheless.

2) Somebody to Love- All the boys with girlfriends (yes I am including Puck in that group) approach Sam to get in on the Bieber experiance. Apparently all the bfs are suffering from their significant other’s “Post Valentine’s Lull” and alls they want is some suga. They all Biebster their hair, put on zipup hoodies and hit the stage for their honeys. God this number was fun. Artie and Sam headlined the performance as the girls rushed in. I quietly reminisced on my NSYNC days in my head during this scene.There is more chalk floating across the stage than a gymnastic meet but the dancing is so good I don’t even care. Bravo The Justin Bieber Experience, and please, encore. The only one that doesn’t love the Biebster is Finn becuase it is cramping his style with Quinn. On the other hand this lands Sam a date with both Quinn and Santana. No Santana just come to me, I have big lips too, I promise!

3) Take Me or Leave Me- Sue is finally out of her “Sue-icide” funk and back into her “destroy happiness/Glee Club” shenanigans. She calls both Mercedes and Rachel into her office to find out what it takes to be a Diva. (Side Note: We discover the AMAZING tidbit about Sue’s past that she used to be the tambourine player for Wilson Philips. Yes the one who sang Hold On. Sue you complete me). The two girls have very different definitions of what it means to be a DIVA. For Merecedes it is all about the weave, the ‘tude, and waving that winger. For Rachel it means being insanely emotional and apparently giving birth to your emotions. Unbeknownst to each other, Sue is trying to cause internal Glee drama by putting these two Divas at odds. Rachel announces that in order for this to be a “true” Diva-off, the song had to come from the show tunes genre, and now I am in heaven.

The two girls perform “Take Me or Leave Me.” It is a good performance, both their voices are perfect as always.What I have a problem with in this song is the passion. I am a HUGE Rent fan. I first saw the play when I was in fourth grade (yes I know I was too young to understand it and probably too young to see the play but blame my parents not me) with the original Mark. I have seen the play on Broadway two more times since then and of course have seen the movie. I do love this song, and in the movie version of Rent this song is my favorite (although I did not love the accompanying marriage scene). This track, in the movie, is filled with SO MUCH passion. There is love and hate and lust and anger and all the problems this dysfunctional relationship holds all balled up into one number. That is what I love about the song. It is a song about acceptance which is hugely emotional. In the Glee version though it is about showing up the other person. It lacks that emotional component which makes this song so goosebump worthy.

But on a happier note, the performance allows Rachel and Mercedes to put aside their Sue driven feud and just enjoy singing together, because in the end they are two friends who love to perform together. Sue just cant win today.

4) This Little Light Of Mine: Yes I am counting this as a song. This was one of the most heartwarming songs ever performed on Glee. Will was not a huge fan of Sue’s behavior at the Diva-off, since you know she was all like “Where’s the hate” and all that. Becuase of all this negativity Will decides to take Sue on a trip to the Pediatric cancer ward equiped with a bunch of adorable kiddies.

I know that I am a huge sap, so for my heart to melt doesnt take alot, but seriously if Sue’s heart did not melt a little bit because of these kids there is something seriously Serial Killerly wrong with her.

5) I Know What Boys Like: Really do not know what to say about this song. I thought it was cute that Lauren was nervous about performing and that she took Pucks advice of seeing everyone in their underwear. Besides that I did not understand the point of this song. Can the actress of Lauren not actually sing? I don’t think that is the case, I was under the impression that all the students on the show needed to know how to sing. I found this just very awkward and out of place and did not have any real musical component to it. The best part of this performance is when Lauren motorboated Artie!

6) Sing: Sue was uninspired by the songs that the Glee kids had picked as anthems this week. Instead she picked a song about dreams and such. This is like a young dykes dream come true, a bunch of hot girls in flannel and Sue in a flannel track suit.

It was a good song but it seemed a bit screamy and less singy. I agree with Rachel that “Sing” is not the song to win Regionals, but I disagree that they should write their own music.

What do you think guys? Do you feel bad for Quinn?Did anyone else catch Rachel's "To Do List?" Seriously awesome!

Did you miss Kurt? Are Kurt and Blaine makeout friends now? Let me know!!!

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Top Chef 8: All Star Drinking Game

So here you go everyone, another wasted Wednesday. This is for you my dear old Top Chef fans. Get sloshed with the chefs in the stew room:

Drink Every Time:
Tre laughs
Carla makes you laugh
They announce the winner of a challenge
Marcel pisses someone off
Every time Tom touches his chin
Padma is wearing an inappropriate for the kitchen outfit
Tom talks about pointing fingers
Everytime a cheftestant takes a drink
There is a argument/fight in the grocery store
Someone throws someone else "under the bus"

Special Drinks:
Someone forgets a part of their dish/ doesnt have time to finish plating x2
Gail out-boobages Padma x4

Sip Whenever:
Someone talks about how great they are
Someone says "I'm not here to make friends"
Someone says "I'm here to win"
You see and or here a brand name plug

Also remember when Top Chef was in Rochester that one time in season 5.

 Yeah, the city actually still does exist. And yes, they were practically in my back yard! I used to row down to that area every morning !(Also a sidenote to my side note is that there is NO way this was actually filmed near or around Thanksgiving because it would have been snowing and they FOR SURE would need to wear jackets). I am super surprised they did not go to Wegmans for groceries but that is their loss. Also because it was Rochester, of course it started raining. Anyway enough about Rochester. Fun Drinking everyone.


Let me know if there are any rules you want to add!

Monday, January 10, 2011

Top Chef 8:05- Dim Sum Nightmare

So after cooling off from Wednesday night’s Top Chef results (as well as reading both of Gail’s blogs as well as Tom’s) I am ready to write this recap for y’all. But it’s the 100th Episode GUYS. In TV world that means syndication, so lets go on with the show!

Stew Room Pt.1: Everyone is in the Stew Room stewing over Spikes departure in the last episode. Antonia says that Angelo needs to fix his “chef Tourettes” and get his hands out of people’s dishes. Just give him some of the pot you “only smoked in HS” ;) and that should cure him. Blais then continues his bitching about Jaime lack of cooking (as does the rest of the country) and then compares her to and Octopus. I was with you for a bit Richard but you completely lost me with the octopus reference. The only thing I think of when I hear octopus "awe, you guys made me ink" from Finding Nemo.

Quick Fire: Padma is wearing a shirt straight out of the circus to announce this week’s QF challenge. Tom Colicchio walks out as the surprise/guest chef for this challenge in all his shiny bald headed glory. He has to cook a dish as quick as he can, and whatever that time is the cheftestants have to cook a dish in that time as well. After almost killing Padma with a tray of cut of fish (which Tiffany and Carla could not look happier about) he manages to finish his dish in 8:37.

The chefs gather around the dish like Hyena’s trying to get their chance to taste the Famous Tom Colicchio’s 8 minute dish. Now the chefs have to cook in the quickest quickity quick quick Quick Fire to date. Marcel grabs Tom’s leftover fish to avoid the mad dash to the fridge and even Tre called this move “freakin’ awesome.” In the end though Mike Isabella wins and for the first time in quite a while the award isn’t $10,000. Don’t worry though Bravo does not want you to think they are cheap so they just gave Isabella a car. No biggie. Jaime makes the comment “I think speed’s important in different contexts. I’ve dated people who are fast I might be construed as fast.” Well, um, I don’t think I’m gonna touch that one. Angelo loses because he was being (according to Gail Simmon’s blog) cocky and did not actually cook anything.

Jalapeño Bra?: I had no idea where to put this, but I had to mention this scene. I really am not 100% sure of what went down in this here, but this is my interpretation. As per usual, the chefs are getting their drank on in their loft. The girls are talking about bras. Antonia gets jalepeno in her eye and goes to the sink to wash it out. Tiffani takes off her bra and randomly puts it in Antonia’s face. The boys clear out with Mike Isabella saying “we’re out of here, their rubbing faces with bras.” I am not sure what Mike is thinking, but if I heard there were girls rubbing their bras in other girls faces, “clearing the room” would not be the first thing that came to my mind. (I couldn't get a good screencap of this, believe me I wish I could).

Elimination: The chefs now have to head to China Town and make Dim Sum in a busy popular Chinese restaurant. On top of that, they also have to work as one team. Already this challenge has disaster written all over it. To add to the fun the chefs have to go shopping for their food at a Chinese grocery store where no one speaks English. At this Chinese grocery store Fabio has a mini emotional breakdown when he sees a tank full of turtles. He proceeds by tells this heartwarming tale about his pet turtle:
Fabio: When I moved to the United States, I bought a little turtle. She’s a princess. Once or twice a week I take her for a walk. I have a little Chihuahua leash that I tie around her shell and tie up to the chairs so she just go back and forth. Now these guys are cutting turtle to make turtle soup and that’s mean!”

You tell them Fabio. Also Jaime decides that she is going to scallops. It’s de ja scallops, I feel like I am back to season 5. Apparently so does Fabio who brings back the lovely “It’s not Top Scallop” quote. Fabio, you are on a role tonight.

When they get to the restaurant, the chefs begin to struggle off the bat due because of the setting of the kitchen. On top of the appliances not being up to their standards, everyone is plating as though they are in a 5 star restaurant. Too bad they don’t have time to do that since there are 250 hungry diners upstairs. The whole point of this challenge was to cook quickly and serve food; Tom even said it after the QF challenge. The only people able to get their food out quickly were Dale and Angelo. Dale even had enough time to shine his shoes (dude is he wearing clogs?)

If you thought that this situation looked really awkward and tense on screen, you should read Gail and Tom’s blog about what it was like being there. It was 10x more awkward than you could imagine. None of the food is ready and no one is moving fast and the only people that are getting food in the dining area are the judges. Everyone in the dining room is starving and not getting any food at all. They are angry and people are threatening to leave. Apparently people were stealing food off the carts as they were being brought to the judges table. I think the only time in my Top Chef viewing history that I was happy I was NOT a judge.

Judges Table: This week the bottom FIVE chefs were called first which included Antonia, Casey, Carla, Jaime and Tre. Jaime had not one but two bad dishes this week. I think it is to make up for the zero bad dishes she had last episode due to the fact she did not ACTUALLY SERVE FOOD! They didn’t like her scallop dumplings (surprise surprise) and thought her long bean dish was basically “bad American takeout” which had been sitting out for hours. Although the judges loved Anotonia’s Shrimp Toast, she was in the bottom because of Jaime’s horrendous cooking of the long beans. Fortunately though Antonia only prepped the dish and therefore did not contribute to it tasting like crap. Tre’s desert, which was supposed to be cold and firm got ripped apart for being liquidy and gross. Carla got reprimanded for her dish being bland and being more occupied with making it look pretty. Ultimately though, the chef to go home was the lovely Casey, who left her Chicken Feet and Waffle dish in the hand of Antonia while she was taming the angry Chinese diners on the floor. Apparently the dish was cooked so bad that the judges weren’t able to judge it, because they couldn’t eat it. I guess it is better to eat something that tastes like complete doo doo then not being able to eat the food at all. I am bitter and want Jaime off PRONTO.

In happier news the top four chefs were Angelo, Fabio, Tiffany and Dale with Dale as the winner. All the judges made sure to pat lil’ old Fabio on the back though for being able to cook something that was not Italian.

Sorry for the delay. Expect my Grey’s recap in the next three days.

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Drunk Little Liars: PLL Drinking Game

 Welcome everyone to the new round of TV drinking games for this winter. First show up Pretty Little Liars. What could be better than getting a little buzzed or blackout while watching Rosewood's finest get stalked by a mysterious A.
Drink when:
An adult actually acts like an adult
Someone gets a message from A
There is a flashback Hanna's mom discusses money
Spencer arbitrarily accuses someone of being A
Aria is playing an instrument or singing
Any of the girls actually work on homework
Someone says the word "secret"

Special Drinks:
When Emily kisses anyone x2
When a new secret is revealed x3
When Hanna gets some action x3
When everyone gets a message from A at the same time x4
During the creepy closing scene- Chug
When we find out who A really is- Keg Stand


(Editors Note: If you and your friends have any modified rules let me know and I will add them to a game per your suggestion. Also let me know if you have played the game! I would love you know what you think.)


Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Pretty Little Liar 1x11: "Moments Later" More Secrets Come Out

Horray Horray Horray. Everybody cheer because after the excruciatingly long wait, Pretty Little Liars is back!

Money Loan and Broken Bones: The episode starts off right after Hannah gets hit by an anonymous car, literally a “Moment Later.” Oh wow, I get it now, THAT is why it is titled “Moments Later!” . While driving home with a pocketbook of stolen cash Hanna’s mom gets pulled over by a cop. She is freaking out because, well, she has a buttload of stolen cash in her pocketbook. Much to her relief they did not pull her over because of her illegal activities. They only pulled her over to let her know her daughter was rammed by a car. Phew. At hospital Mrs. Marin is clutching that bag of stolen cash so tight that it may just explode.

She tells the girls that Hanna is going to be just fine. I thought she may have been really hurt or something but, you know, she only has “a broken leg, a broken ankle, bruised ribs” and the possibility of a splenectomy. Nothing to be worried about. The girls are now officially freaked. How did it get to this? Should they go to the police? Who is A? They decide to not come to any conclusions until they find out what Hanna saw.

Secrets Out: Aria meets Mr. Ezra Fitz at his car, in the middle of town, in the middle of the day, in broad daylight. He shows her the “I See You” note that was left on his rear window the previous night. Ezra’s all like “That is too specific to mean nothing, someone saw us” and Aria is all like “It means nothing, why have you not wiped this lame note off your car yet you dumbass,” and then proceeds to wipe it off herself.

Aria is proved completely wrong when Hanna reveals to the girls that she saw Noel Kahn (Aria’s fling between Fitz hookups) write the note on Mr. Fitz’s car. Hanna keeps looking at Aria, not sure of how much to divulge. She deals with this in the same sensitive way she dealt with the Emily and Maya’s relationship. She doesn’t tell everyone about the secret but makes sure Aria feels safe and comfortable to reveal the information. Aria finally reveals to everyone that she and Mr. Fitz have been seeing each other since before school. Next thing you know Noel shows up to bring Hanna a care package and it is awkward for everyone. He lies to her about his whereabouts the night before and the cute and innocent Noel is looking more and more suspicious.

Back at Aria’s crib Spencer and Emily tell her about Allie and Ian’s (Melissa’s ex who Spencer kissed) love carving in the woods. They try to narrow down who A can be. It can’t be Toby, because he was in jail. It can’t be Ian, because he was shacking up with Melissa all night. So logically the only person left in the world is Noel. Poor poor Noel. Noel comes to see Aria in the music room the next day and school and admits he went to the party to play a joke and scare the girls. Way to make yourself look like a creepy loser Noel. While there he saw Aria go into the car and thinks that Fitz forced Aria to go with him, but Aria sets him straight. Like I said before, poor poor Noel. Aria cant bring herself to tell Mr. Fitz that Noel knows (say that ten times fast) about their affair.

Ian’s a Creep: Aria and Spencer go for a stroll in the woods to find the Ian and Alison love tree, all the while discussing Aria’s illicit love life. As though the words came right out of my mouth, Spencer tells Aria “Part of me thinks this is really self destructive behavior, most of me just thinks its really hot.” Ms. Spencer Hastings, truer words have never been spoken. When they get to the tree, it is no longer there. Someone apparently came and cut it down, and then removed it. Seriously, is A a lumberjack. How in gods name does a normal person cut a tree down, cut it into logs and then remove it from the woods with no one noticing in a day. Also wouldn't there be like a HUGE indent or make on the ground from the tree falling? A must have superpowers or have minions doing her dirty work.

When they get back to Spencer’s, Aria is as baffled as I am by the disappearing tree and can only comprehend it by saying “A tree Spence, an entire tree.” But that is not the only surprise of the day. Upon opening the fridge, Spencer finds two bottles of champagne, followed by Ian walking into the kitchen in a suit. Apparently Melissa and creepy Ian decided to get hitched. Uh Oh.

Mona goes to visit Hanna to make a peace treaty. It is not really important but I just wanted to show the screencap of her waving a white la Perla “the international peace symbol.” Ha.

Hanna On Drugs: While in a drug induced daydream, Allie appears in a candy-stripper candy-striper's uniform. She tells Hanna that what happened to her was more complicated than algebra, which makes me wonder if she is really bad at algebra, or what happened to her was actually not complicated at all. Dream Allie gives Hanna cryptic messages saying that if the four PLL’s put their heads together they will figure out what happened to Allie and that a good lie is better than a bad truth. I hate Allie so much that it pains me to admit that I do kind of agree with her. Then Allie is all like “I really should do something about A, that bitch is getting one my nerves” and then a closeup of a cup with Allie’s lipstick.

While “asleep” in the hospital Lucas comes and leaves a soft sweet kiss on Hanna’s farhead. He comes by the next day and brings her a tray of all different flavors of pudding. No joke, this boy knows the way to my heart. Lucas admits that he kissed her when he thought she was asleep.She tells him the truth; she has a boyfriend and she sees Lucas as just a friend. Now I just want to say poor poor Lucas. He would be so much better for her than Sean who does not get her at all. I am on team Lucas.

Coming Out: While on the phone with the lovely Maya, Emily’s dad walks in the room. He begins interrogating her, in a stern, low, and raspy voice about Toby Cavanaugh. He bans her from visiting Toby in jail, which is totally understandable for a parental point of view. Her dad keeps pushing her, and pushing her to tell him what is making her act so strange recently. Finally she breaks and says that it is not Toby she is afraid of it is her parents (translation: I am gay). She is not who they think she is (translation: I am gay). Everything is not that simple (translation: I am gay). If only this wasn’t an American teen drama she could tell him that she is gay. But then something miraculous happens... EMILY COMES OUT! Thank you so very much PLL. Emily has progressed from believing something was wrong with her because of these feelings to fully embracing her sexuality. I cannot imagine how hard it would be to come out to strict conservative parents, but I applaud her for being true to herself. Sadly though, her father says nothing, and just sits down on the bed facing away from her. Poor Poor Emily.

Emily’s parents are downstairs in the living room discussing the news that their daughter’s a big ol’ lezzie while Emily sits on the top of the stair eavesdropping. Emily’s compassionate mother first blames Maya for Emily being gay. She wants to discuss ways to “fix” Emily and then Mr. Fields expresses the voice of reason saying “this is not like buying her braces, this is who she is.” Thank you for being smart, but your stubborn closed minded homophobic wife still thinks it is all Maya’s fault. Maya must of turned her gay. If people had the ability to turn other people gay, wouldn't the whole world be gay then? I mean if I had the ability to turn anyone gay that I was attracted to, believe me there would be alot more gay girls in the world. With every word that comes out of Emily’s mom’s mouth, I hate her more and more. When Mr. Fields says to try and keep things in perspective, she is not doing drugs, she is not pregnant she replies “What is your perspective between right and wrong?” And then she is all like “Emily being gay is going to ruin her life, we did not raise a gay daughter. Why are you not as homophobic as me anymore, did you leave your bigotry out in Iraq?” He is all like “Dude I have seen people die in the desert for the last 8 month, Emily only told us she is gay. She is alive and healthy and that is what is important to me.”

Well suffice to say that Emily did not have the best experience coming out to her parents but I am happy that they showed her father, the parent who is in the military, as more accepting and understanding of her sexuality. This show is watched by a demographic that until recently only had lesbians who, after sweeps were over, went back to being straight. This is a girl who is a “normal.” She is pretty, popular, athletic, and also just happens to be gay. She she is not experimenting; she has feelings for a girl and is sick and tired of lying to her parents about it. That is why she came out and that is why her father’s attempt at understanding his daughters sexuality is that much more important. I know there is going to be ridicule about him constantly saying “Do you think I like this, I don’t,” but I think the fact that he still accepts Emily as Emily, and that he knows that this is who she counts for a lot. He may not “like” her being gay now but that does not mean that he won’t accept it. I am proud of how this episode told this coming out story in a fairly realistic light.

Double A?: Back at the hospital the girls discuss the disappearing tree act. Why would A carve Ian’s and Alison everlasting love into a tree and then just cut it down. Maybe A has a split personality, or maybe.... A IS TWO PEOPLE! I called it. Well kind of, I did say A either had super powers or minions which is basically the same. They move the blanket to reveal that A had been to visit Hanna and left an “apology” note on her cast while Hanna was asleep. Creepy to say the least.

So what did you guys think of PLL’s return. Is Noel going to kill Fitz? Will Emily’s mom turn into a wicked witch? Does Dream Allie know who A is? Will that lipstick stain be important? Let me know what you though and if you have any answers to the above questions.