Black and Whites: The Pretty Little Liars sit in the empty Rosewood Theatre watching a black and white movie (the type that Emily even likes). All of a sudden, a hooded man with a hook pops up in the back of the theater and screams “I Know What You Did Last Summer!” Turns out it was just one of Spencer’s nightmares. That does not matter though. What DOES matter, more than anything in the universe, is that Melissa’s wedding ring is missing, and must be found immediately.
No Dairy: Hanna struts into the kitchen wearing a dress stolen from Spencer’s wardrobe and is greeted by her parents having a hardy morning chuckle (not a sexual innuendo).
Tom is still in town and staying at the Rosewood Inn. The situation gets real serious when Hanna realizes her mom bought non-dairy creamer for Tom. Hanna tells her mom to that anything Tom Riddle does from here on out should be Isabel’s problem and not theirs. Ashley puts on her parenting hat and tells Hanna that “Just because someone hurts us once doesn’t mean you delete them from your phone book.” Hanna just responds with “Dude, A has hit me with a freaking car and I still can’t get her out of my phonebook.”
Hanna The Lonely: While Emily’s staring into the restroom mirror, three bathroom stall doors open in prefect sync, and three plastics Liars strut out.
Hanna wants to hang out with the girls after school but everyone is busy. Emily and Spencer have practice and Aria is taking a class at the college Ezra is now professing at. Okay guys, let’s talk about the elephant in the room. WHAT THE HELL WAS IN ARIA’S HAIR. Is that a dead bird? Seriously, what is that thing? Did she see someone with a feather stuck in their hair and think to herself “Now THAT is the next big fashion statement?”
Hanna the Lonely is sitting in the school courtyard and out of the corner of her eyes she sees Lucas. Hanna calls out for Lucas and the two have a mini catch-up sess. Apparently Caleb and Lucas had some intense male bonding during their roadtrip to Arizona (and back) because now the two live together. Lucas ends up asking Hanna to help on the yearbook, which is good because she has zero other people to hang out with.
While in yearbook, a light bulb appears above Hanna’s head when she sees Lucas eye up a cute girl. Hanna new mission: Get Lucas Laid. Lucas is shy about his crush and reminds her that he is a humungous loser with a .000 batting average. Hanna ignores Lucas’ self pity and finds Danielle. She tells Danielle that Lucas is a hunk and an awesome catch; Danielle takes that bait. Lucas is not very happy about this though. He thinks that Hanna has some sort of an angle and is playing games. After admitting to Lucas that hurting him was “the biggest mistake of her life”, Lucas jumps on board with the plan.
Pottery Class: Aria meets up with Ezra before her first college class to complain about her new student ID picture. He comforts Aria by saying the picture is perfect if she was going for the “Young Prison Laundry Lady” look. Ezra, that’s just you hoping Aria will be your Laundry Lady when you finally get thrown in prison? Aria changes the topic and asks Ezra how it feels to be released from the prison (HS). Is anyone else sensing a theme in this couples conversation today?
From a distance Jackie (Ezra’s ex) watches Ezra and Aria passionate goodbye kiss. One of two things are probably racing through Jackie’s mind: 1) Why is my ex dating a highschooler? 2) How did that poor bird get in that girls hair? Aria is in for a big surprise when she walks into her pottery class only to find the one and only Jennabot is also enrolled. When the professor asks Aria for her name, Aria goes “I can’t use my real name or Jenna will know I am here. What is a name that starts with an A that is almost as outdated at Aria. Oh I got it, Anita.” Before we go any further, I have to say Aria is the worst pot thrower I have ever seen. Unless she is trying to make a pile of shit, this is a mess.
Spencer and Emily: Spencer rings Emily to tell her about a creepy curtain in Jason’s house. Emily gives Spencer some perspective: “Sometimes when all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail.” Although Spencer responds with “Why are you talking to me like Ben Franklin?” what she really meant was “If that is what you want, you can be the hammer to my nail.” She begs for Emily to come over and keep her safe and have cuddlefest but Emily is not allowed. Emily advises Spencer to just lock her door; that will keep her safe. Last episode A punched into Spencer’s window to get into her house; how the hell is simply locking the door going to help? Get your head out of your ass Emily!
Cue a flashback as Spencer remembers one of the ragers Jason threw at his house. In the middle of the party, Ali came over to Spencer’s house upset about her brother’s behavior. Soft music begins to play as Allison went to wash an apple in the sink. Tears flowed down her cheek as her reflection sang back to her “out on my own, it’s such a scary place”.
When Spencer went to comfort Ali though, Ali’s bitch walls were back up and she insulted the Hastings’ apple selection.
Sisters Before Misters: Melissa continues to scour her house, in search of her missing ring. Spencer tries to let Melissa knows that she is aware Ian is alive and Melissa is in contact with him. She delivers her most awkward speech with “I know things I wish I didn’t know and I would hope you would protect someone who is me before you protect someone who is not me.” Melissa plays dumb forcing Spencer to get more creative in her “I know the truth” analogies. A teary eyed Spencer tells tries to remind Melissa that they used to care about each other. One upon a time a bully, Kendra, was bullying Spencer and hit her with a jump rope. The next day Melissa walked up to Kendra and threatened to throw the bully off a bell tower if she touched her sister again. For a second, it appears that Melissa may have a change of heart, but it ends up just being hormones. Melissa denies that the “Kendra Thing” ever happened. I guess pregnancy can cause amnesia. After the fight, Spencer is horrified to discover that the toaster is not working! She deduces that the unplugged toaster is not working because a diamond ring is behind it.
Hanna In Harvard: Emily, Hanna and Aria have a secret meeting inside Emily’s car on the busiest street in town. Emily shows the girls the forged Danby acceptance letter she is going to mail to her mother. Hanna is proud of Emily and begins to dream of the two of them conning their way into Harvard. Aria, on the other hand, is not all too thrilled. She says “Lying is bad especially to your parents. Except if you are dating your teacher.” Hanna tells Aria that unless Aria’s first pottery lesson is to “make a weapon to kill Jenna with” she should shut her trap. She then quotes sage advice Ali once gave her “It’s not lying, just pretelling the truth.” You know your actions are morally acceptable when Allison DiLaurentis agrees with them.
Bloody Chinese Food: A well sculpted, shirtless Toby is helping Jason build his “keep people out fence.” Jason tries to bond with Toby, but Toby is not having it because Toby only bonds with Pretty Little Liars. Magically, Spencer Hastings emerges from the woods. Jason asks if Melissa is the dame Toby is talking to. Upon hearing the word “Melissa,” Spencer’s head swivels towards Jason: “Why would you think I am Melissa? Does Melissa come here a lot? What are you doing with my sister? Is she the mysterious person in your house? Is a half dead Ian living in your house?” Jason just goes “Chill out Nancy Drew, my mail gets wrongly sent to your house 3 times a day every day, so she brings it over. NBD, It happens to everyone.” Jason ignores Spencer and continues throwing bags of garbage onto the front yard. When one of the garbage bag spills out Chinese takeout and Bloody gauze Jason just goes “So I cut myself while eating Chinese. Again completely normal.”
Spencer begs Toby to quit his job with Jason but refuses. The only way to buy that truck is with money, and Jason gave him an advanced. Taking her sister’s lead, Spencer decides to choose Misters over Sisters and brings Melissa’s ring to a pawn shop. She uses the pawned ring money to buy Toby his truck. A is going to buy that ring. This isn’t even a spoiler. If A doesn’t buy that ring than she is not on top of her game. When Spencer hands over the truck keys to Toby, Toby confesses his love to her. Spencer gets annoyed because she wanted to say "I love you" first. Best. Lesbian. Couple. Ever.
I Love Mrs. Fields: Emily is sitting at her desk reading and re-reading her fake Danby letter when mom comes in with a box of from the attic. Inside the box are objects from Emily’s childhood, including an old teddy bear and a pumpkin hat. Pam sits down on Emily’s bed and plays with the stuffed animal. With tears welling up in her eyes, she looks up and Emily and says “Emily, it must have been so hard for you to hide who you are; and to think that if you told me the truth, that I, I wouldn’t still love you no matter what.” After Emily tells her mom she no longer is hiding who she is, Mrs. Fields replies “I know you don’t, but it wasn’t easy getting here.”
Before we get into how much Pam has grown since last season, let me just commend Mrs. Fields for being the only parent to show any interest in their child in the last 2 episodes. The Hastings’ are on a mysterious trip, the Marin’s are sharing “martinis” and “wine” and I have no idea where the Montgomery’s are. Mrs. Fields has been home with her child. Now onto how awesome this speech was. Mrs. Fields is looking at her daughters childhood toys and clothes and realizes whether gay or straight that the girl in front of her is the same girls who held that teddy bear. She loved the girl who wore those tiny mittens as much as she loves the teenage sitting across from her. She regrets that she forced her daughter to hide who she is from her mother, the one person that is always supposed to be there for you. It was heartwarming and touching and I cried. Pam Fields, you win mother of the year award.
As soon as Pam leaves the room, Emily realizes that she can’t send her mother the fake Danby letter. Her mom is trying to be open and honest with her, so she has to be open and honest with her mom. Emily tears up her Danby letter and mixes it in with the rest of her garbage. From a scale of “Files in the stream” to “Mona ripping up a letter and pouring slushie on top” I would rate method of destroying evidence a 7. Soon we find out that A can outsmart a 7 as Pam runs into Emily’s room with a Danby acceptance letter in hand. It is amazing to see how excited her mother is, Pam is amazing. Emily rummages through her garbage to find the creepiest note from A ever “You can’t play cat and mouse if the mouse moves to Texas. I need you here Em. Congrats!” The creepiness of this letter is so far off the creepy charts, I don’t know how to even classify it. Emily, just remember what you told Spencer. Just lock your door and you will be fine.
Poor Jenna: After pottery class Jenna asks “Anita” for some help. Aria plays along trying not to say anything, so Jenna can’t recognize her voice. I am going to assume that when in a studio it is harder to decipher people’s scent because of the glaze and clay and kiln. Aria places a candle in the center of Jenna’s pottery and spins it on the turn table. The way the light danced along the walls truly is breath taking.
Jenna asks Aria what the light looks like, but Aria is saved from answering as Jenna starts pouring out her heart. Before she was blind, Jenna would swim in a pond and would find the bouncing of light underwater fascinating. This piece was supposed to represent that. Aria is brought to tears by Jenna’s story and sings to herself “Oh No Anita No Anita, No. It isn’t true not for me. It’s true for you not for me. I hear your words and in my head I know their smart. But MY HEART Anita but my HEART.” Aria then describe what the lights look like to Jenna, and Jenna instantly recognizes Aria’s voice. She yells at Aria to blow out the candle, and the two girls stand in the pottery room, in the dark.
Midnight Meetings: Spencer overhears Melissa on the phone with mystery man, so she invites Hanna and Aria over to investigate. They follow Melissa to the street and see her get in a car with a man that is not Ian. The man in the car is Wren, the second bf of Melissa that kissed Spencer. Spencer somehow connected a brown paper bag to Wren giving Melissa drugs to give to Ian. I really don’t understand that logic, but Ill let Spencer have this one. And the best closing line of the night goes to the one and only Ms. Hanna Marin with “She asked the guy she dumped to help the murderer she married?
What did you guys think? Let me know below.
Love Always,
APB
1 comments:
omg i love hannahs clothes i want to no where to get them she is my idle:]
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