Pretty Little Liar 2x11: "Doctor Knows Best"

Emily-vention:

Emily is tossing and turning in her bed, at 3:07 AM, when she receives a mysterious text from A. After a full 2 hours and 8 minutes of processing this text, she decides to run away from the Marin house. As Emily revs the engine of her, Hanna awakes and realizes her dear roommate, and friend, is gone.

Like any good lover friend, Hanna calls the other two PLL’s to investigate this disappearance, and they come as quickly as possible. Aria is sure that Emily has fled to Texas, and is correct. The camera cuts to Emily, who is in the woods running to Texas as they speak. She’s obviously ditched her car by the side of the road, realizing that traveling by foot is the most practical and safe option. The girls find Emily’s phone and realize that the reason Em’s fled was because A sent her a racy pic of Ezria making out. 

Underneath there is a note reading “clue Ella and I’ll let you out.” Since Emily has a stronger backbone than Hanna, she decided to NOT tell Ella about Aria’s illegal relationship with her teacher, but to flee to Texas instead.

Emily has decided Texas may be a bit too far and instead, she chooses to show up at Dr. Anne Sullivan’s door unannounced, ready to “tell Dr. Anne the truth.” To Emily’s surprise, the other PLL’s are sitting in Dr. Anne’s office as well, worried about Ems’ well-being. Emily walks in and starts freaking about all the pressure that A has been putting on her and does not want to be a pawn in A’s game anymore. The girls have a cryptic convo about A while Dr. Sullivan listens, completely confused. Finally, Dr. Anne screams out “What the HELL are you girls talking about. Stop talking in twin; I can’t decipher a thing you are saying.” The girls finally admit that for the past two year a crazy anonymous shim has been stalking and threatening their lives, and that they are not sure what to do about it anymore. 

Dr. Anne: “This person has been stalking you guys for the last year and a half. This person has also been threatening your lives, right? How in Jesus H. Christ’s name am I the first person you told about this.”

Spencer: “We would have told you sooner, but there were just a few problems. A new that Emily was gay at first. After Ems came out, that was no longer leverage, and A knew Emily lied to her rents about Danby. A also knew that I slept with Ian and hooked up with Wren. A knew that Hanna’s mom stole millions from a dead chick. A was the reason Hanna become bulimic. Last but not least, A knows all about Mr. Fitzy and Aria’s illegal affair. If any of this shit gets out we are fucked. All of this is confidential right?”

As a group, the PLL’s migrate to Rosewood High to keep up their “I am a normal teenager” façade while sipping coffee. Emily is 100% sure that Jenna took that perfectly guilty picture of Aria and Ez making out. Spencer rolls her eyes and slowly tries to explain how everything really went down:

Spencer: “I know that Jennabot has super powers, but Jenna is B-L-I-N-D. That means she cannot see, so she probably could not have taken this amazingly awesome incriminating picture on her own. I bet her weird ass Peeping-Tom cop bf helped her take this picture. “

Before the girls could comprehend this information, Hanna’s AWESOME G-MA shows up asking Hanna to aide her in some butt wiping!

Jenna Beat Down

The next day in school Dr. Anne arrives and delivers a lecture on virtual bullying.  Noel, Mona, Lucas, The Liars and 20 other students attend this assembly. The entire time Hanna bugs Aria about wanting to peace the fuck out.

Hanna: “I feel like Dr. Anne just ripped our clothes off in front of everyone.”

Mona/Lucas/Caleb: “Wait, what? How did I miss that?”

Aria: “Stop over reacting Hanna. It has been three minutes since the assembly ended and we still haven’t gotten an A message. This is good news.”

Jenna: “Is that Anita’s voice I’m hearing. That lecture was too little too late. You know because you and your posse blinded me while I was molesting my step brother.”

Emily: “Takes a bully to know a bully. Get out my way before I kick you in the stick.”

When Jenna doesn’t move, Emily tackles her down the stairs and the rest of the girls follow suit. (Cue my sister’s first comment on how ugly Aria’s outfit is.)

Mike:

Since the Montgomery’s are unaware their 16 yr old daughter is dating a college professor, their only parental issue to debate is Mike’s mental health. It is actually quiet sad watching the two parents fight because it comes down to the “medication vs. therapy alone” debate. This is an issue that many parents have to face. Most parents want to try the non-medication route as much as possible, hoping they will not need to introduce foreign substances into their child’s body. Sometimes though, medication is the only way to fix the chemical unbalance.  It is heart breaking to watch Byron deal with his son’s depression after he has dealt with his brother's in the past. 

That night, Aria attempts to lure Mike out of his lair.  She tries to level with him being like “take it from me, talking to anonymous people online and through texts can actually be dangerous.” Ella walks in and tries to take away Mike’s computer, and this computer tug-of-war ensues results in Ella spraining her wrist on a nightstand. Instead of realizing just how fucked up her son is, Ella begs he daughter to lie to her father about this whole altercation. Ella, you know you did the right thing when you ask your children to lie for you! 

Step Sisterly Hate

Hanna and Nanna Marin drag themselves to Tom’s pre-wedding party? I am not actually sure what this party is for. It’s not an engagement party because they’ve been engaged for ages and it’s not a practice dinner because that is supposed to be the night before the wedding, right? Anywho, at this “unnamed” party, Hanna is attempting to make peace with the evil Kate Chandler. She hands Kate a peace offering in form of a used horse book she found in the Hastings Manor. Kate pretends that they are totally cool now, but we can all see the Chandler scheming wheels turning in the back of her head.

The two sit down to discuss the speech they will need to deliver later that evening. Hanna is really nervous about public speaking so Kate goes all Marissa Cooper and pulls a water bottle full of vodka from her purse and pours it in their lemonades. (Actually, Marissa Cooper would never take the time to transfer the vodka to a water bottle. She also wouldn’t mix it and would chug it straight from the bottle.) Kate starts to bond with Hanna over Caleb and Hanna is so drunk she can’t see through all of Kate’s disgusting fakeness. After fooling Hanna to chug some more vodka and eat a few rounds of Coconut Shrimp, the two girls head to the ladies room.

Hanna: “Wow this bathroom is so big and pretty. I want to live in here! Sorry about this used horse book I gave you as a peace offering. I should’ve bought you a Playgirl typewriter instead. I am feeling sick, can you bring the sink to me?”

Kate: Haha,. Want me to take my mom’s wedding dress out. She thought bringing it to the party and having me babysit it was the best way to keep it safe.  I can’t wear it though because it is a truth dress. It makes my skin look green to show the wicked witch I am.

Hanna: Wow, that dress is Fierce. Lets order a pizza.

Kate leaves to fetch Tom some greasy food for Drunk Hanna, and Hanna decides this is the perfect time to twirl around in Isa-hell’s “fierce” wedding dress. We all can guess what happens next, vomiting on the dress. Next thing you know, Tom barges into the ladies room to “check in” on Hanna, and right behind him in Nanna Marin. Tom throws his daughter and mother out of his party just as Kate walks in the door. Nanna rips the purse off of Kate’s shoulder and dumps its contents on the floor. Inside, she finds two identical bottles, one filled with water, one filled with Wodka. Hmm, I wonder which one Hanna drank out of?

Toby’s The Man

Toby is working hard at the Hastings’ Manor when he hears music blasting over next door. Toby walks over and witnesses Jenna gobbling down some cherries and lining the pits along the dashboard. Toby’s face describes it all.

He hears Garret leaving Jason’s house and stealthily hides behind a tree. Phew, all I can say is: Toby, you need to teach the PLL’s the proper way to hide behind shrubbery.

Later, Toby and Spencer make-out in Toby’s truck on the DiLaurentis/Hastings property line. Toby freaks out when he sees two shadows coming from Jason’s attic. Spencer tries to ignore it and continue making out. But come on, this is Spencer Hastings we are talking about. Toby basically just waved sleuthing catnip in front of her face.  Spencer storms out of the car, ready to kick down the DiLaurentis door when Mr. Hastings walks out. Toby awkwardly runs after Spencer and then The War of Hastings’ begin. Spencer has had it with her father’s sketchy meetings with the DiLaurentis family and wants answers. Mr. Hastings turns it around and decides to viciously attack Toby, and we see Toby awesomely defending his girls honor. In the end, Spencer and Toby jump into Toby’s fast car so they can finally see what it means to be living.

Allison: “So Nanna, what would it take for you to disown one of your children?”

Nanna Marin: “I don’t own anyone. There was a war that took care of that you dumbass, read a book.”

Allison: “What if your son stole a family heirloom and then sold it for drugs and then was convicted for the murder of his sister.”

Nanna Marin: “Well crazy little girl, neither of my sons would do that. If this hypothetical situation did ever happen, I guess maybe yeah. I would disown them.”

Back to present day all the pieces come together for Spencer. Allison made G-ma change her will and then Jason killed her. The only question left now is why Mr. Hastings changed the DiLaurentis will in the first place. 

Emily: “I don’t mean to pry, but why is Nanna Marin staying with you instead of Tom?

Ashley: “Truthfully, Nanna likes me a lot more than her ass of a son. Also she is a little coocoo in the head. She gave Tom and me a lawnmower as a wedding gift.”

Emily:  “I don’t see anything wrong with that. It sounds really practical actually.”

Ashley: “Why are you here having an intimate dinner with me and not out with your gf?”

Emily: “Things got super complicated at lesbian poker night when I gave her friend my number.
Ashley: “Aww, you girls will make up. It took me sleeping with Tom again to realize that he really is an ass and Isa-hell can have him. Thanks for talking to me and making this night a little less rough.”

Emily: “I am always here to stare deeply into your eyes Ashley.  I’m also here if you ever want things to get rough.”

After Emily realizes she isn’t gonna get any from Ashley, she calls up a past lover and heads over to Luke’s Diner. And guess who walks in, MAYA!! Oh hello Maya, it looks like druggy boot camp has treated you well. Maya is completely surprised that Pam has let her little lesbian daughter live in the Marin’s house and is convinced Pam has bugged the restaurant..

Emily:  “I am sorry, everything was my fault. I was scared of everything and scared of you. It is totally my fault that you broke up after I paid Caleb a hunk of cash to hack my phone. I’m no longer afraid though.”

Maya: “It’s okay sweetie, we have all night. I’m not leaving until I get my Calamari.”

(as the night goes on)

Maya: “So let me get this straight. This bitch tried to drown you and then you dated her?”

Emily: “Yeah I guess you came just in time.”

Okay, not cool with this Paige bashing. Yes, she shoved Emily’s head under the water, and maybe she still is a bitch.  But come on, Emily and Paige’s chemistry was awesome. I also just love Lindsay Shaw. 

Dr. A gets A’d:

After a long, emotional day of therapying, Dr. Anne finds a creepy message on her voicemail. It’s a recording of her asking “And I’m the first person you told about this?” on a loop. Like any normal person, Dr. Anne calls the police immediately. When they show up, she is adamant that they find where the bug is; unfortunately she forgot that she is dealing with the Rosewood P.D. so obviously Garrett shows up.

Garrett:  “Maybe if you us the names of the people who were in session with, we can find out who taped your sessions.”

Dr. Sullivan: “Unlike you, I am actually a professional. That information is confidential.”

Garrett: “Well if you are not willing to go against everything you believe in and destroy the trust your patients have with you, I can’t help you. Sorry, it is really up to you?”

Once the cops leave, Dr. Anne decides to do some investigating of her own. We get to see excerpts from the chart of who Dr. Sullivan thinks A is (did that make sense guys).

First: DOB is in 94… so we know that it has to be a kid in HS

Second: A is seeking help for having “Overpowering feelings of revenge” and “Anger Management”

Third: Have you ever thought about how you would kill yourself? No, Only others.

Fourth: This excerpt about the patient “Demonstrates sudden outbursts of anger and aggression. Client seems confused about the nature of…[missing]… ability assumes is their job to “police” and monitor all activity in the neighborhood… [missing]… suspicious. Often refers to unnamed adversaries as “nosey bitches.”

Yeah that last line seemed to catch Dr. Anne’s eye. Immediately she calls the girls and lets them know that she knows the identity of A. She doesn’t tell them the identity on the phone though, and wants all four of them to meet her at her office. Dr. Anne, you were doing SO GOOD at the investigating thing until know. Of course, when the girls get to the office, Dr. Anne is missing and they receive a text that reads “The Doctor Has Left The Building.”